


kisses and stars

by AccioInvisibilityCloak



Category: Twelfth Grade (or Whatever) (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Other, Tammi Belcik/Maria Waites Wedding, Weddings, prompt: things you said under the stars and in the grass, prompted on tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-11-06 13:16:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11036937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AccioInvisibilityCloak/pseuds/AccioInvisibilityCloak
Summary: At Tammi and Maria's wedding reception, Liv slips out to take a break and work out some anxiety beneath the stars. Viola joins her.





	kisses and stars

                                                                                                                                    *******

           Liv Belcik could feel herself start to breathe more heavily, sweat slicking along her body, her hair falling down out of its elegant twist updo. The heat and the crowd inside were invading all her senses, pressing in on her and making her head spin. The music was too loud. Everything was just… too much.

Thank goodness Tammi and Maria had opted for a summer wedding. That meant it was easy for Liv to slip out of the massive white canvas wedding tent and onto the empty lawn.

          The parents of both brides had helped to pay for the rental of space in a large, scenic park about an hour outside the city. It was immediately, blessedly quiet out here, and Liv marched as far out into the park as she dared. She sighed in relief as she sank down onto the grass, heedless of possible stains on her pink bridesmaid’s dress. It wasn’t a color she’d have chosen for herself, but today was her cousin’s wedding, after all.

It had been a beautiful ceremony, and Liv had even managed to deliver her maid of honor’s toast for Tammi without hyperventilating, thanks to all those hours practicing with her therapist and then with Viola in the weeks beforehand. It hadn’t been until the dancing part that Liv had suddenly realized her social batteries were completely drained. And then she’d panicked.

         The cool night air and the silence calmed her now, and she stretched out on the soft grass, eyes closed, clutching her heart until the Xanax she’d brought kicked in and took away her chest pains. She stayed there, silent, for who knew how long.

Liv just didn’t understand why weddings had to be so _overwhelming_.

         Her anxiety had improved by leaps and bounds this year, but Liv still couldn’t imagine wanting to spend all this money just to be the object of everyone’s attention and scrutiny for a whole day. It sounded awful. Surely, there were other ways to communicate to your partner that you wanted to be with them for the long haul.

Sitting up to look back at the softly glowing reception tent, Liv saw a familiar silhouette poking out from the entrance. Speak of the devil.

Liv smiled softly, feeling the blush creep into her cheeks yet again, as her date for the evening drew near. Even in semidarkness, Viola looked absolutely dashing in a suit.

         “Liv! There you are, I lost you for a while,” she said, relieved. “Are you okay?”

“Come sit with me?” Liv asked, patting a patch of grass beside her.

“Ah, what the hell,” Viola said, dropping unceremoniously to the ground. “My natural state in life is ‘grass-stained,’ anyway.”

“It’s practically inevitable,” Liv laughed, reaching for her datemate’s hand. Viola interlocked their fingers and squeezed Liv’s hand comfortingly.

“Do you want to be alone?” they asked. “I understand, if you do.”

“Thank you, but no,” Liv said honestly. “I’d like it if you stayed. Do you- Oh, never mind.”

“No, tell me,” Viola said. “You can ask me anything, I won’t judge.”

“Okay. Do you think you ever wanna get married? Like, to anyone?” Liv blurted. “Because- I know it’s stupid, but- I don’t think I could stand it. Having to spend all day exchanging small talk with distant relatives and feeling everyone staring at me and judging my dress and my color scheme and my relationship- I would hate it, Vi. And I know we’ve only been together for a year, and it’s so ridiculous to even worry about this, but I’m afraid… I’m afraid you might want a wedding like this, someday. And that if I didn’t do it, you would think I wasn’t serious about our relationship, or that I didn’t love you enough, and then who knows-”

“Whoa, whoa, Liv,” Viola said, trying not to sound as amused as she clearly was. Liv tried not to feel hurt.

“I’m sorry,” she said, looking down at her trembling hands. “I know it’s silly.”

“No, it’s okay. Listen, I would never ask you to do anything you didn’t want to do, especially if it was going to make you anxious,” Viola said. “And I’m definitely too young to get married, even if I wanted to.”

“Me too,” Liv said awkwardly. “I mean, of course. I’m the same age as you. So. Yeah.”

Viola moved closer, moving to place a hand on Liv’s waist. “Can I show you something?”

          Liv nodded, allowing Viola to guide her body so that she ended up lying on the ground again, this time with her head in the crook of Viola’s neck, their hand still clasped in her own.

“Look at the stars,” Viola murmured, kissing her cheek. “You can see so many here.”

“They’re beautiful,” Liv said, allowing herself to get lost in the night sky, so many twinkling stars usually hidden by city light pollution at home. She felt like she and Viola could fall right into that expanse of blackness. It looked so peaceful.

She let out a deep breath, and the last of her anxiety finally unspooled, leaving her spent, even approaching calm.

 “I like this way better than weddings,” Viola said, still watching the sky. “But don’t tell Tammi I said that. Or Oren. He’s been planning his dream wedding to Drew ever since their six-month anniversary.”

“Thank you for this, Viola,” Liv said suddenly, turning to face her demigirlfriend. “I do love you, you know.”

“I love you too,” Viola grinned, brighter than the stars, and leaned in to kiss her lips, gentle and sweet.

          A too-short while later, they were both getting sore from the tough ground, and they’d long since lost count of kisses and stars. The wedding tent beckoned, warm and a little less intimidating than before.

“You okay to go back in?” Vi asked, standing up and holding out her hand to Liv, who took it.

“I am. Thank you for coming to find me, Viola,” Liv smiled tiredly, tucking herself in against Vi’s side again as they headed back to the tent, and the leftover wedding cake waiting at the table with their names on it.

“Yeah, of course. Always,” Viola said, squeezing her in a sideways hug.

“Always,” Liv repeated quietly, and it sounded like a promise. Like a vow.

                                                                                                                              *******


End file.
